The internet has fundamentally changed much of the way we do things. Information is readily accessible by the truckload, which also creates a burden to research instead of casually and blindly choosing a path whether it be where to eat dinner, what movie to catch, or which toaster to buy. Online dating certainly has benefits for opening up a whole new medium of accessibility and being able to meet people you might otherwise never cross paths with.
On the other hand, with the expectations the internet in general has created, it often comes up in discussions that it would be nice to be able to have more outside information on these dating prospects. Sure there will forever be the problem of people who rate without direct firsthand knowledge, but wouldn’t it be nice to have the ability to see some additional opinions? Like many situations in life, when things are going smoothly I have a nagging pessimism to wonder what is lying in wait under the surface. Yet, when it comes to involvement with another person, it seems downright rude to ask, “So really what’s wrong with you?” Shouldn’t profiles have these fields as well? I certainly confess my own shortcomings such as terrible coordination and lack of punctuality, but obviously I am not going to be a complete debbie-downer when the point is to be attractive to a total stranger.
Whenever I have been analyzing relationships and wondering why/how someone is single my friends have been quick to point out that being single can be a matter of circumstance and not tied to specific flaw. It got me wondering what types of negative reviews* I would have if those who have dated me were able to post their experiences to my personal file to warn others:
- refuses your offer of a drink, but then helps herself to yours
- terribly indecisive – makes shopping errands drag out far too long
- kind of a slob – leaves belongings scattered about, lets dirty dishes pile up
- has opinions on what you should order from the menu and then always requests bites from your plate
- boring travel companion – often falls asleep in the car
- OMG the shedding, seriously her hair gets everywhere
- she will try to convince you ice cream and popcorn are dinner foods
- never listens to her voicemails, don’t bother leaving her a message
This is not to say I come totally unrecommended or completely lacking in positive reviews. I know I am a good person, but I also acknowledge that everyone has traits that can be annoying to others. I still don’t know whether it would be better to have these tidbits available upfront, or if it is better to be in the dark and figure these out independently. Is it better to be prepared, or would this negative information prevent any interest at all? What would be helpful potential date review information?
*Obviously arbitrary, surface complaints. After making a comparison to Yelp/Amazon reviews I’m not about to casually list the cruel, deeply personal statements that have been made during breakups.